Blinkers, Bad Attitudes, and the "Me-First" Trap: What a School Parking Lot Taught Me About Modern Business

Lauren Deats
Jan 24
5 min read

Blinkers come standard. Manners... not so much.

Hey Bloomers,

If you know me at all, you know I believe in speaking your mind and not sugarcoating your opinions and making sure people know how you feel. A fact the gentleman at my daughters school was unaware of when he thought he could yell at me out the window in front of my daughter.

Yesterday, I had one of those "bless your heart" moments that made me realize exactly what’s wrong with how we’re treating each other in the workplace and the job market today.

The Incident aka Blinker Gate. 🚗🔆

Woman Driving — Yes, It Really Matters..

I was in the thick of the school pickup line; that chaotic, daily Hunger Games we parents endure. My daughter had just hopped in, buckled up, and we were sharing that "glad that’s over" sigh. I started to pull away, keeping a steady pace, when suddenly, a car to my right decided he was the only person on the planet.

No blinker. No polite "mind if I squeeze in?" wave. No hesitation. Just a bold, aggressive pivot right into my path. If I hadn't been paying attention, my front bumper would have been part of his driver door. Naturally, I gave a little "hey, I’m here" tap of the horn; nothing aggressive, just a friendly reminder that physics still applies.

He completely ignored me, looking straight ahead with a grip on his steering wheel that said "I’m in a hurry and everyone else is an obstacle." So, as one does, I maneuvered into the next lane to exit. We ended up side-by-side at the stop sign, and that’s when the audacity reached a fever pitch. He rolled his window down, threw both hands into the air with the dramatic flair of a Shakespearean actor facing a great injustice, and screamed at the top of his lungs, "Does it really matter?!"

Honey, I rolled my window down so fast it probably smoked. Because as a true southern woman, I cannot, and will not, let you holler at me in front of my child without a proper response.

I looked him dead in the eye and said, "Yes, it does matter. I had no idea you were moving because you didn't use a blinker. If I hadn't seen you in time and had to swerve around you, I could have hit a child. We are at a school."

The transformation was instant. The grumble stopped mid-breath. His hands dropped like lead weights, and a wave of pure, unadulterated shock washed over his face. You see, he thought I was honking because he "beat" me in the line. He was so hyper-fixated on his position in the queue that he forgot he was in a school zone where safety and respect for the community are the only things that actually matter.

The Epiphany: It wasn't about the Line...

In that moment of silence, as the shock settled into his features, I had a realization that hit me harder than his near-miss on my bumper. He wasn't just a jerk; he was a man living in a completely different reality.

He genuinely thought my frustration was about rank. He believed I was honking because he’d managed to sneak ahead of me in the queue...a petty grievance for a petty ego. He was so consumed by the "win" of being one car length ahead that he had completely tuned out the safety of the children, the rules of the road, and the basic dignity of the person next to him.

It was a sobering look at how some people are so obsessed with being first and judging everyone they think is trying to "beat" them, that they lose their respect for people along the way. They aren't looking for safety or success; they are looking for a trophy in a race that nobody else is running.

So it made me wonder... Are you using your professional blinker?

In HR, and especially in this wild job market, I see this "Me-First" obsession every single day. Here is how that parking lot entitlement is breaking our professional culture:

1. The "Blinker" is Just Basic Communication

In the corporate world, "using your blinker" means being transparent. It’s the "heads up" you give your team when a deadline is shifting. It’s the feedback you give a candidate instead of ghosting them. When you stop communicating because you’re "too busy" or "too important," you aren't just being efficient, you’re being dangerous to the company culture.

2. Assuming Everyone is Out to Get Your "Spot"

The man in the car assumed I was upset about the line. People in the office do this all the time. Someone offers a critique on a project, and the recipient immediately thinks, "They’re trying to take my promotion" or "They’re trying to make me look bad." Actually, Karen, they’re just trying to make sure the "car" doesn't crash. Not every piece of feedback is an attack on your status. Sometimes, people are just trying to keep the kids safe; or in business terms, keep the project from failing.

3. The "Me-First" Ego vs. The Big Picture

We are living in an era where people are so desperate to "win" the interview or "beat" their colleagues to the next title that they lose their respect for the humans standing right next to them.

When you cut corners (or cut people off) to get ahead, you might get to the exit of the parking lot five seconds faster, but at what cost? You’ve signaled to everyone around you that your ego is more important than the collective safety and success of the group.

The Bottom Line: Leading in Modern Business, Without The Road Rage.

If you’re so focused on the "line" that you forget to use your "blinker," you aren't a leader; you’re just a hazard. In the landscape of modern business, we look for the people who understand that how you get to the destination matters just as much as when you arrive.

Team meeting at work. Group of 5 people standing next to desks, holding paperwork and talking.

If you find yourself wanting to scream "Does it really matter?" because someone corrected you or "slowed you down," it’s time for a professional tune-up. Here are a few ways to be a better human and a better professional on the road to success:

Signal Early and Often: Don't wait until you're already turning to tell people your plan. Transparency builds trust; silence builds anxiety. If you’re pivoting a project, give the "heads up" before the crash happens.
Check Your Blind Spots: We all have them. Instead of getting defensive when someone points out a mistake, assume they’re trying to keep the "car" on the road, not kick you out of the driver's seat.
Respect the "School Zone": Always keep the mission (the kids, the customers, the company goals) at the center. If your desire to "win" or be "first" puts the mission at risk, you’ve already lost.
The Three-Second Rule: Before you react to a colleague or a "competitor," give it three seconds. Ask yourself: Is this about my ego, or is this about the goal? Most of the time, that frustration you're feeling is just your pride getting a little dinged.
The Polite Wave Goes a Long Way: Gratitude and humility are the grease that keeps the corporate machine running. A simple "thanks for catching that" or "I appreciate the heads up" costs you nothing but buys you a mountain of reputational capital.

Success isn't about being the first one out of the parking lot; it's about getting everyone home safely with your integrity intact. Keep your windows down, your blinkers on, and for goodness' sake, bloomers... watch out for the kids.

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